_____ to inspire.

I recently came to the conclusion that the world is full of two kinds of relaters: Inspirer and discouragers.

Being a discourager doesn't make you a bad person. Not at all. If it weren't for those that discouraged, there would be no safety in the world and particularly in the arts.

With that said, I wanted to share something that an inspirer friend of mine recently shared with me.





Fill in the blank with any of the following words: create, perform, act, sing, write, teach. There are more words, of that I am certain.

quandary

I have never realized how possible it was to feel smart and stupid at the exact same time.

It is not just that I feel smart, and then something happens to make me feel dumb. The two just happen simultaneously.

We are working on the difference between por and para in Spanish right now. One of the conditions for the use of para is a "surprising comparison," like, "Se porta muy mal PARA reina." Which means, "She behaves poorly FOR a queen." I explain this to you, because it seems interesting that there is a rule called surprising comparison.

It seems to apply here...

I feel really dumb FOR a smart kid.

I can't wait to learn more. I really can't wait. I feel like I am slighting myself, because things like Spanish get sacrificed for one class, and then another for directing, and then my acting class gets completey shat upon. It's not that these things aren't ALL important to me, I just don't know how to get it all dealt with. I need a timeturner...really bad. I also don't need to be spending so much time browsing random blogs...

Neat-

I have a habit of saying this word in certain situations.

These situations would not typically elicit the word "neat."

Obviously what I mean is that I use it sarcastically, one may even say, ironically.

I daily find myself thinking, "...yeah, and?" or, "what the hell kind of bearing does that statement have on this situation...AT ALL?"

I must say that I am a people watcher. I like to observe. I love to hone my skills of perception. It sometimes makes me seem like an ass, but you know what? I don't care. I am not an ass. I just really want to understand others. What makes them tick. This is really grounded in, "I don't want to dislike anyone. I just want to understand them."

I was recently involved in a production that said, "To idealize is to fundamentally mark as different; it is not to respect. It is to fundamentally mark as different and, therefore, not equal."

Some people might somehow interpret my desire to understand others as analyzing or idealizing. I just want to say that that is not the case. I love my fellow man, and I believe I above all am so very very flawed. I just never want to hate or dislike someone simply because I don't understand where they are coming from. Everyone has justifications for their outwardly upsetting behaviors. I think my problem here is making up "problems" and calling them "justifications." This in turn goes right along with the "when you assume you make..."

Thus. I see the point. I can be kind of an ass...But I mean well.

TANGENT RECOVERY:

When someone says something like, "Yeah, this is my last day of crew for a while. My last day for the semester. Man. Yeah. Gonna be busy with other things for awhile. You know...'Cause of...Yeah. You know."

I simply have to smile and say under my breath, "Neat."